What about Mary?

I was looking at the manger scene and I thought: "What about Mary? Imagine how things must've been for her...My lord! She was just a teen! I remember researchers saying that she could've been from fifteteen to seventeen years old when she got engaged! How did the responsibility of raising Jesus feel for her?" -wide eyes-
That left me with something to think about and to parallel with my own life.
If it were me, I know I'd freak out at all that I'd have to do and be in order to become a good mother and set the right example for Jesus. I'm sure Mary did an amazing job though, imperfect and human as she was. She was picked out from all the women of the Earth for a reason. I can imagine Mary's tears, sweat and smiles; her effort to do the best she could and the love God had placed in her heart so that she would give it out and let it spill on others. She had the Son of God to love, as well as her fellow men.
And I know that as a human, she also must've failed, like any of us. It's also a fact she was young, quite young when she was given the biggest responsibility a woman could ever have.
Then I thought about my struggle with feeling incapable and giving myself reasons of why I can't do things, why I'm not prepared, how my experience and knowledge are insufficient. These things are true though, I am insufficient, I don't know what to do or how to go about doing things. The point is that all of that doesn't matter. Contrary to logic, Jesus can use that to do anything!
Actually there's logic there: when there's less of ourselves, there's more space for Jesus to fill, take over and use to accomplish His purposes.
My mind's favorite excuses are: "I'm too young", "I have no experience", "I won't do it right" and "I'll fail". But that's because my fears are completely afraid of drowning, burning, dying and passing into oblivion as steps forward are made.
This past year I found out I can do things I thought I couldn't, and do them right! I also fail, but I can get up! I can reach my full potential and I can do the things I don't feel prepared to do, simply because if they're in front of me it means God has sent them for a reason and He's been preparing me for them.
I don't know what's ahead. I just don't want to put limitations on what I'll do and what opportunities I'll take on. I don't care if I feel small and incapable and if I must face my fears to conquer them. I don't care if the world seems to be closing in on me when I'm in the middle of a struggle, fighting for success. I'll do the best I can, that's my job. And I'll let Jesus do all that I can't, that's His job.
As far of fear of failure goes, He and I are burning that one down together.
I'd like to tell you that this last year I had the privilege of meeting glowing individuals! I watched them shine, fill the need, lead a crowd, do things they had never done before and were afraid of doing! They rose to meet the challenges in front of them. And let me tell you, it didn't matter their age! Although some were years younger than me -smiles-, you know who you are.
How many excuses we come up with doesn't really matter. We'll always have to fight them to get to where we're meant to. They're just that, "excuses" -even if I like calling them reasons.
We can't let excuses keep our potential locked in, keep us from doing all we could, keep us from meeting the people God wants us to, keep us from helping someone else. Most of all, we can't let excuses keep us from fulfilling our destiny and living a full life!
What can a young boy or girl do?
One thing is for sure, Jesus has always used the foolish things of this world.
With Jesus, we have the possibility of doing anything!

My theory

The most fun things in life...

...are simple.

-huuge smile!-

Pondering today...

We decide to accept the gifts of love given to us. That we don't choose to take in the love doesn't mean we aren't loved.

I told him: "I need someone to make me believe in love again." (love between couples)
And there He was, telling me that someone was He.

"It's amazing what love can do", my mom wrote. "It makes you feel alive, like you can accomplish anything, like nothing is impossible."

Why do we run away from love? Why do we try to hide from it? Is it because we're so terrified of being vulnerable? Is it because we think we can't handle it? Is it because we are afraid it'll crush us when it's gone? Is it because we want to prove we can be strong without it? Is it because it makes us feel and look like fools? Or is it because it's so great it frightens us, and it's so simple it scares us even more? We can make loving complicated, but love is in fact simple. And it's what makes life worth living.
God is love.

Looking back

I was thinking back on last year trying to remember what June 2009 was like. I couldn't remember much, but my negative memories had prominence over the positive ones. It made me feel bad because I know good things took place, probably great ones, I just couldn't remember. I know I had happy days along with the struggles.
The thing is, I think we have months or times in our lives when nothing really outstanding happens; but there is the daily grind of forging ahead, feeling hit by waves of emotions, trying not to drown, and somehow in it all, enjoy the ride. There's all the falls, and when one looks back on it, it's not a happy memory.
But I need to change my perspective, because it's cause of those times that I'm here today, and I know I'm better for it. I'm stronger and better able to face that challenges of today.
And about the strong, flying, firing, draining emotions, I've learned it is possible to have a hand on them.
It's possible to be at peace in the midst of the storm, it's possible to get up after every fall...and be happy while at it. All that is needed is to look up.
Jesus is the best psychologist, and He can tell you what to do. He beats the best, best friend -and believe me cause I've got a great one!- He knows just what to do, and has all the power in the universe to make things right again. He just needs our trust, and as we give him time, walk ahead holding his hand, He does all that and more.
He's seriously pro at that, making things right.
I don't know how to handle life, but He does, and that's enough. Like the writer Anne Rice said, "if He knows everything, I don't need to know everything".

"There was the sense, profound and wordless, that if He knew everything I did not have to know everything, and that, in seeking to know everything, I’d been, all of my life, missing the entire point."

Dear!

Dear Ali, Nalies, Mari, Megs, Steph, Windy, Teresa:
Your blogs are dear to my heart! And dearer than cupcakes!
I love it how you share your thoughts, the happenings in your lives -as simple as they could seem to you. I enjoy the pictures you post, and having this way to stay in touch with your lives and your thoughts. They're important to me. Keep it up. Some of you may be criminal bloggers, a bit like myself. That you make the time to post out of your busy/crazy lives is the sweetest!
Just making sure you know that I love you, and those blogs of yours.
Hug yourself for me. I miss you!

Ghosts on a december day

I just finished watching an episode of "Ghost Whisperer", it was the sweetest I've seen!
I had the most enormous smile going on, and then was really touched at some points. One of the those rare times when you get up from the couch warmed inside.
Besides there being a romantic little side to it, with a joining story where a romantic shy Italian tries to win over a certain lady's heart; there was a cute guy acting as "a bad boy", a man named William...You see, all this appeals to Steph's heart.
But in truth what was the best about it was that, as the story goes, this man, William had had a heart operation over 50 years ago -at the age of 16. He died for a few minutes and upon seeing his body under him (yes, I believe in ghosts), and all the nurses trying to revive him, he saw the doctor struggling so badly he had to be taken out of the surgery room, and died of a heart attack himself, thinking he had killed his patient and that he had made a terrible mistake in the surgery room. When the nurses brought William back to life, he realized how precious his life was, since it had also cost him the doctor's own life. So he determined to not waste one second of it.
Not waste one second of the precious lives we all have...
In the story, this man did all he could to "live life to the full". He was one of those old men with gray hairs and twinkling eyes, that you know are very healthy and look so youthful. I believe enjoying life ONLY brings benefits.
I know this is just a story...but the lessons it contains go beyond.
I think that all I want to say -since I just ruined a "Ghost Whisperer" episode for you (guilty grin) is:
Why wait for something drastic to happen, like having your life or that of a loved one in serious danger, or even lost, to realize how precious life really is?
I hope I realize how precious my life is.
Maybe you get to learn how to make the most out of life with time. But all in all these seem to be the basics: live (breath deeply, take care of your body, learn all you can), laugh (enjoy the pleasures -that's what God made them for. Haha, Smile!) and love (we won't ever live till we've loved and loved fully). And then, I think we'll have a great beginning once our time comes to leave this Earth.
A friend used to tell me a lot "Live life with no regrets" and then she'd draw a heart next to that saying. (I love you Teresa)
And so this is me at 5:30 pm, with cold hands, an apron on, bright eyed and with a great need to run away from the computer and finish my book for tomorrow's Language exam. Wish me luck.
P.S. I just saw a double rainbow! -smiles-
Last time I saw a rainbow it was January. Man, time goes by too quickly. -hopeless grin-

Take the lead

There are many important things in life that this movie is able to portray, I love it! Not to mention the exciting dancing. Living life with passion. I don't really remember the number of times I've watched this movie, but it's a favorite.
There is nothing that can keep you down, or hold you back unless you let it.
When you feel you're not made to do something in particular; those feelings mean nothing, unless you don't wanna do it. Otherwise you could become the best in your field! -with passionate learning.
We could have a broken life and broken dreams, none of which are beyond repair, if we wanna repair them. Dreams' wings can grow too, and there are people out there that testify to that.
There is really no set of boundaries but the ones we put on ourselves. We can be great and have great lives, doing what we like to do and doing things that matter. I know that it seems more like I still have a pick, and perhaps someone older doesn't. But then again, there are no boundaries set, no limits to what you can do or not do. You may never become the president of a country, but if that's your dream and passion and goal, you'll get there. The people that outstand in a crowd are those that do what they wanna do with all their hearts, against all odds. Be it become a musician, find a lost love, open an orphanage, run in a marathon, raise a strong family, become the best you can be.

A persistent thought

We just can't take life for granted.

Recently I've been thinking a lot more of what I'd want to do, trying to imagine where and how.
I found myself planning out what I'd want to do then, in the future, when I'm older.
Of course, I know its good to have an idea of what you want in life so that you know whether you're getting there or not.
But really, I have absolutely no idea what will happen to me. I could easily be gone tomorrow. Am I gonna rely on the future to do the things I want to do? The things I know I should do?

Believe in the Invisible -it's there

Our eyes may not see, nor our ears hear but deep within our hearts know.
"Whats the use in believing?" "Will I only feed my hope to see it die?"
I rather believe and draw strength and love from that which my mortal eyes can't see; than to believe nothing and miss all that the invisible world can give.

To one insane Devil

What if I do everything you think I shouldn't?
Do you think I care for what you think is right?
I care not what you think about my life.
I'll do what I want with it.
When it comes down to it, all I want to do is live and die for what I believe, and do my personal best to see that you're in pain.
Sure, bluff all you want, come running with all your heavy armor.
I'm ready and you know it.
Lets see what you'll say when you're tooth-less.