Rethinking Valentine's day

Valentine's day has left an echo on facebook and all around, like the chocolate in my bag. I just read two blogposts written by Jarrid and Juli Wilson that I loved. They have food for thought and I want to share them with you.

Look at this:
"My wife and I have come to the realization that the only way our marriage will last 'until death do us part' is with constant and relentless pursuit, no matter the time and day. This means that we encourage ourselves to treat every day like its Valentine’s Day." -Jarrid Wilson {I love it! It sounds like treating every day like it's Christmas. I'm so blessed that my honey actually thinks this way and prays to do it always.}

"Sometimes love doesn’t come delivered to the door covered in glitter with flashes of bright red and pink. It doesn’t always smell like roses – especially if you choose to serve at a shelter or two. It may not come in a heart-shaped box of chocolates, but I can assure you that it’s the sweetest thing you’ll ever experience. Love goes beyond personal preference and convenience. It’ll always cost you something, but it’ll just as surely will give you back everything you could ever hope for in life as well." -Juli Wilson

I don't know you, but I had to make a conscious effort to think of others this Valentine's and not of myself. That's why this is worth remembering.

Dear Jesus, please help me and every person who reads this to discover the wonder of serving others, being there for them, giving out of our hearts to them, loving them like You do. Please shoot love to the proper place in our priority list. And thank you that as we take time to care for your own, the people around us, in all ways that we can, you bring into our hearts that rich fulfillment found in loving someone more than ourselves. We ask for your help because we can't do that on our own. We want to rediscover the power and transcendence of love! A little love can go a long way. Thank you for creating such a wonderful bomb {love} to change the world with and for inviting us to be a part of it with You! I love you!

Better than you dare think

"Give what you have; to someone it may be better than you dare think." -Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

It could be as simple as a smile, a heartfelt hug, a touch on the shoulder, a happy disposition, a "Have a nice day", "I hope you get better". Things we do that we think are too ordinary to make a difference. They do make a difference.

By Marcie Dixon
I was going through a very tumultuous time, listening to a lot of heavy metal music, which seemed to express the anger, frustration, sadness and turmoil that I felt inside. One day I went into a diner to be alone in my darkness and despair.
Hopelessness and depression were overwhelming me. I had been asking myself what was the point of my life and my future and had come up with a big fat zero. Dark and negative thoughts and feelings had been swirling around me like a whirlpool of thick, black darkness, threatening to suck me into its vortex. I wondered what would happen if I just let myself fall into it, if I gave in to it, if I just let it take me away. I had been toying with the idea of taking my life.
I wondered if God—if there was one—would care enough to stop me. What would He think—if He existed—if I took my life? I knew one thing: I would be free of the relentless pain and torment that was going on in my heart and mind.
When the waitress came, I ordered a coffee while doodling on the back cover of one of my school notebooks where I had drawn a mosaic of sorts—faces, symbols, objects, expressions; most of them dark, lonely, melancholy, and fearful. They came from within, from the feelings in my heart, as well as the expressions of the music I listened to. In the midst of all of the art confusion I had drawn a small flower, hardly noticeable amid everything else.
The waitress returned with my coffee and set it down in front of me, giving me a warm smile that seemed to reach out and embrace me through the fog of depression that had engulfed my soul. It was like a small ray of warm sunshine on an otherwise overcast day. But I had grown so used to hiding what I felt deep inside that my reflex action was to shift my view down to my notebook. I felt embarrassed and a bit surprised that someone was focused on me. The waitress glanced down at my scribbling and said, “I see you are an artist.”
As I took a sip of coffee, she paused for a brief moment, her eyes skimming across the doodles. Then pointing to the tiny flower, she exclaimed, “Oh, there you are! Such beauty can't be hidden even amidst all this!” She smiled again as I looked up at her. And then she was quickly off to wait on another table. I marveled that she had noticed that tiny flower so quickly. To me it seemed nearly buried in the midst of the mass of confusion of images. I looked at the little flower. Was that really me?
Finishing my coffee, I gathered my things to leave. I was digging into my bag for some money for the bill when the waitress returned, placing a beautiful long-stemmed rose on the table in front of me. I was shocked! But before I could react, the waitress quipped, “Remember, you are that rose to someone.” She then reached down, touched my hand and said, “The coffee is on me,” and disappeared to take care of another table.
As I walked out onto the street, the sky didn’t look so gray and gloomy anymore. It felt crisp and fresh. What just happened in there? I wondered. A total stranger, who knew nothing about me or what I was thinking, had pierced my bubble of darkness with warmth and kindness and hope. Was that God? Was He there after all, and did He care about me? All I knew was that I felt different and the heaviness I had felt in my heart was gone.
Maybe there is a God after all. Maybe He does care and have a purpose for my life. I couldn’t say for sure, but that day I decided to find out if He did have a purpose for me. A tiny seed of hope grew from that experience and became a turning point. Eventually I found Jesus and His love and hope and comfort. That waitress’s encouragement to me started me on my journey which led me to Jesus and His eternal love.

"There are so many all around us who feel about as small and overwhelmed by life as that tiny flower. When the darkness is so great, even a little light can do miracles! A little word can be a lifeline that leads to hope for a lifetime." -Maria Fontaine

This is a post that stayed a draft since 2010. I was looking through drafts today and found this to be a great encouragement. I was just thinking how I want to do some things that require money that I don't have. "That's fine" this story tells me, "You need to wait to have money to do some things, but making a difference is not one of them, you can Give what you have."

The leash: A reflection about a healthier Life

Last Sunday I had a very vivid picture of what it means to have an unhealthy relation to someone else's emotions.
It all started with a nice walk with my dog, Charles. We walked near my house, which is perched at the top of a hill. Some dogs came along and attempted to claim the front of our house as their territory. This wasn't something Charlie would allow. I shooed the dogs away and as they left, Charlie ran after them with all his might. The strength of a well-fed 1-year-old lab took me extremely quickly down the hill trying to stay on my feet. Soon enough the inevitable happened. I fell flat on my face in a mixture of concrete and dirt. I know it was the latter as well because some of it was on my mouth and nose.
I'm happy to say my bruises are no longer dark purple and it's a miracle nothing was broken or sprained. Yet, there was a question that made me think, "Why didn't you let go of him?" my sister asked. "Oh, I did! Once I was on the floor!", I responded at first. But then I felt a little glimpse of realization. Aren't my relationships with people sometimes that way? If my loved one is sad, and if I choose to attach an unhealthy emotional tie between me and him or her, my spirits will come tumbling down, no matter how great of a day I was having. Similarly, it can happen with happiness, and fear, and jealousy and all kinds of emotions.
The problem is that I let others guide my emotions, when I should be in charge. Just like with Charles, I was supposed to be in charge!
It's a weird phenomenon I'm still learning about but I know there are healthy and unhealthy responses that we can have to others' emotions. And it's tricky for me to get rid of some of these habits. Yet, I've taken it to Jesus and asked for his help and I can say He has been working!
For instance, if X is having a terrible day and chooses to look at the negative side of everything, before I would say, "Poor X! He's in a bad mood again." Finding out why was my mission, and then I would try so hard to revert X's mood. This wouldn't work most of the time of course, and if it did, it was short-lived. And the situation with X would continue, which would sadden me and make me unhappy for days until magically X had a happier day cause he finally decided to look at the bright side of life. This is taxing. Not the way I want to live.
Now, when X is having a bad day I'm not happy for it, cause I love X. But I know that X has a choice: to get himself out of the pit. He knows I'm here if he needs me, but if he doesn't want to come that's his decision. I'll still pray for X. Yet I'll be having a merry day because I choose to. I might be saddened that X doesn't want to join me, but my joy cannot be lost because of X. The joy of living is much too precious to tie it to the emotions of a mortal which I have no control over. I know I have to be mature enough to accept that every person makes decisions and I cannot make them for them. They have a choice and I have my own.
And the choice I have to consciously make every moment is to tie my joy to Jesus, and not anything of this world, including people.